What I Want to Remember

some nights, like tonight, i sit at my computer and scroll through all my old pictures of the kids on Facebook. ugh.. it breaks my heart.  not in a bad way, per-se, but it's one of those 'i love them so much it hurts' types of things.. i'm sure all you mothers can relate.  anyways, while looking through them i notice there are a lot of little moments that probably no one else, besides maybe ben, really cares about. no one cares about preston's pudgy hands he had as an infant, or the insanely adorable gaps in his teeth when he was almost one.  no one cares about his sideways glances at the camera, as he tells me so much with his eyes and devilish smirk or that he wears his underwear backwards.  no one cares about his insane love for animals.

and no one cares about parker's toothless grin that he'd flash me while we'd cuddle in bed in the mornings.  no one cares about his long, messy, curls that he had. no one sees the old, sensitive soul, wise beyond the wee age of three, that i see.  no one cares about all the sound effects that he makes, and the faces that go with them.  no one cares about his curiosity and desire to learn, that you can literally see when he looks at something.

no one cares about spencer's 'scrunchy face' (that parker also made at the same age).  no one cares about his way of watching his big brothers, just waiting for the moment that he is old enough to do what they're doing.  no one cares about his adorable sleepy eyes when he wakes up or his pride when he masters a new skill (no matter how small it is).

but i do.  

i care about it all.  it may seem that i photograph the most ridiculous things at times... a detail shot of their hands while they're playing cars, or how uncomfortable they're sitting while they are reading, but those are the things that make up my days.

i often forget my camera when we actually 'go' somewhere, or i take it with but it never comes out of the bag.  for a split second, whenever we're leaving a place, i regret not taking pictures of the boys while we were there.  however, then i remember... sure i want to remember the good times we had while visiting the zoo, but that's not makes up the majority of my memories.  i want to forever remember the little things, that truly are the big things.  i know i will forget a lot of them, i already have, and that is why i am even more thankful for the random snapshots i have of their grubby faces and dirty fingers. that is what makes up my boys.  

they are messy. they are loud. they are rough. they are the thieves of my sanity and they are my everything. and the moments i share with them at home are my everything... the tears, the giggles, the bath times, the before-bed-stories, the cuddles.

so, to many of you, the pictures i post of my kids may not mean anything, but to me...

they. are. everything.

what do you want to remember about your kids?  

don't forget to capture that memory because, all too soon, you'll become distracted with another day and you'll forget that tiny thing that made up so much of who your child is.