first off, happy mother's day!
i don't have much time to post.. we're finally moving today!
for those of you who know me on facebook, you may be aware that littlest man is sick today. today, of all days. when daddy isn't here to help and i'm packing to head to the new house. well, the day started off pretty messy.. literally. spencer summoned me to his bedroom, for me to take him out of his crib. he gave me a half smile (looking back, i should better describe it as one of those, 'oh please help me' types of looks. you know, the kind that you're in horrible pain and you just want someone to fell sorry for you?) anyway. i picked him up and he threw up all over me.
didn't he get the memo that it was mother's day?
i won't give you a play-by-play of my entire day... just know that it consisted of nursing, carrying him on my back, cleaning, and packing.
i figured it was time to hop in the shower before we take off (did i mention that i'm so excited to be moving today? haha). now, what to do with the little bugger? there is no possible way that he'd let me put him down. he's barely holding his head up today, let alone getting him to sit up in the tub the entire time. so, i did what most mommas do... i held him while i showered. i did my best to wash myself (insert eye roll).. i'll shower tomorrow. but this little guy (who is now sleeping on my lap.. so sweet) immediately laid his head on my shoulder and dozed off while the warm water ran down his back.
i looked at him with those adoring eyes that all mothers have for their children and it came to me that this probably was so beautiful. at that moment, i wished i could leave my body and see it from the outside. my eyes started to well up at the perfection...
his sweet face
the curls that appear when his hair gets damp
his pouty bottom lip that was hanging out
his long, lush eyelashes that had tiny drops of water suspended on them
his perfect skin, being showered by the warm water as i rocked him side to side under the shower head
yes... he is perfect
then that got me picturing 'us' again and, to me, how realistically beautiful it must have been
his little arm hanging down at my side.
my side that is decorated with stretch marks from carrying these three amazing boys
his little dimpled butt that was resting just above my tummy.
the tummy that has grown soft over the years
his other arm wrapped around my neck, with his fingers wrapped in my hair.
my hair that has not been trimmed in who knows how long and is often pulled back into messy ponytail because it always gets in the way
his little head laying just above my breast.
my breasts that have nourished and comforted my children over the years, leaving them a little less perky than i'd like
as the tears were coming down, thinking of all of the perfection it became clear to me that i'm not imagining the beauty.
it is here.
it always has been and it always will be.
happy mother's day to all of you 'real' beautiful mommas out there. please take a moment today and pay tribute to how perfect you really are.