Mind Your P's and Q's

I recently read an article that talked about having/making your children say 'please' and 'thank you'. A woman was struggling because she didn't 'force' her children to say thank you.  She gave them the opportunity to and if they didn't right away, she would take the time to explain why they should ('Wow.. That was really nice of Billy to share that toy with you.  Doesn't that feel good when someone shares?  Doesn't that make you happy.') say thank you and then she would drop it.  After reading that article I was at a crossroads.. Should I continue to 'make' Parker use his manners, or should I change my approach?  I decided to stick with the path that I was on.  I read the article again and it seemed like the author's children were older and I felt that Parker could still use direction under that matter.  However, I decided to start explaining 'why' he has to say 'please' and 'thank you' every time. 

Needless to say, I am so glad that I stuck with it.. Not only does he say it on his own sometimes, but I knew I did the right thing when we were getting in to the car one day after Sam's Club and Parker asked me to hand him his toy motorcycle.  I did and was just about to shut the door when he said, 'Thank you, Mommy. Parker happy.'  It was like those little words opened a flood gate of emotions.  I was so proud of not only him, but of myself.  People without children may not understand how something so little, can be so big to parents.  All I can really say is that I was one. proud. mama.

I was given probably one of the best compliments I have ever received.. A complete stranger walked up to me, in the middle of a carnival, and said, 'You make having two children look easy.'  I replied with a typical eyeroll and 'thanks'.  All I could think is, 'Is this woman blind, deaf or just crazy?'  Little does she know I often feel like screaming, ripping my hair out and locking myself in a closet  (I told her about my blog, so maybe she will be figuring that out soon if she decides to check it out)...  Anyways.. That compliment got me thinking... The 'ease' that I have had with parenting is not only a compliment to me, but also to the boys, Ben and our ability to all work together.  I am just thankful that I recognized that fact early.  Lately I have been trying to vocalize thanks and compliments when/where they're due (because who doesn't like to hear that they're doing something awesome) and I have also been trying to accept compliments a lot better (I obviously need more work.. Read the first few sentences of this paragraph).  I am trying to train myself that I am worthy of hearing that I do something good... Just look at my beautiful little men...

This whole mommyhood thing has definately been an 'on the job' training course, but I like to think that I am doing a pretty good job.  It has been so rewarding to see how much the boys have learned (thanks to me or the situations I put them in) and it is so exciting to see their personalities and love for each other show.  We are talking about having them share a room in a year or so and I can just imagine the giggles, fond memories (and of course fights) that they will share while they're in there.  If these last few months are any indication of how it will be... I am very excited!  They both love each other SO much and I am so thankful that we have all 'fallen' into our places.  Parker is the boasting big brother, always looking out for little man (side story.. Parker was playing in the playroom with his weed whip and he either scared Preston or hurt him.  Well, Preston started crying and before I could walk in there, Parker turned off the toy and said, 'I'm sorry Preston. No cry.'  Seriously.. He's two.. Is that normal.. Either way.. It's awesome!), Preston is the giggly little boy who is in constant awe of his big brother and I am the mama bear that is always here to teach and protect them.  Ahhh.. It's just too awesome for words how I feel right now. 

As always, I am excited to see what our future will bring for us!

Dear Precious Boys...

Dear Parker and Preston,

I just wanted to take this time to explain myself to you...

First of all, I am sorry that I have been so impatient with you lately.  Preston, I know I need to remember that you're a quick growing little boy, so when you're hungry.. You're really hungry.  However, please stop screaming at me if I don't fill your plate fast enough.  All that really does is make me want to throw the food at you.  I promise to try to keep my cool from now, but please.. Can you try too? And Parker, I KNOW the world is a very interesting place for you right now and that there are so many awesome things that catch your attention, but you're driving me a little bonkers lately! You are such a smart boy, and I know that is because you are so interested in learning, but sometimes Mommy forgets that, so please don't take it personally when I raise my voice to get you to get into the car.  Long story short.. I am sorry boys.

Even with being so exhausted, all of the time, I am so excited to start everyday with you two.  (Especially this morning.. Thank you so much Preston for waking up babbling in your room and for quietly playing in there for thirty minutes!  That was a great way for Mommy to wake up)  You both do so much for me and I am sorry if I ever take advantage of that.  You are the best things that have ever happened to me and you have taught me so much in the little time that we have had together. 

The joy that you both have just radiates and I am so thankful that I get to see that everyday (along with the tantrums, but hey..).  The love that you have for others is astonishing and I would like to think that you 'learned' that emotion from me.  I love you both so dearly that sometimes it truly hurts when I think about it. 

Oh Parker.. Don't even get me started about how proud I am of you.  You are growing into one of the most amazing children I have ever seen.  You are funny, smart, sensitive and freakin' adorable.  Words can not express how happy you make me.  Like I said before.. You also drive me bonkers, but all I need is one of your sideways goofy looks and you have me wrapped around your finger again.  Preston, please don't think that I don't see those things from you, because I do.  I am just really excited for you to be able to vocalize your personality the way your brother can.  I already have witnessed the amazing little boy you're growing into and these next few years are going to be so fun and interesting with you that I cannot wait!

I feel so blessed every time I think about each of you and I cannot wait to see what truly wonderful things you do in your futures. I love you both so much... Even on our 'worst' days!

Creative Addiction...

So.. These last few days/weeks I have been drooling over many adorable 'crafty' projects.  Luckily, my wonderful husband thought I deserved a new sewing machine so my list of 'must complete craft projects' has just doubled in size!  Now, if only I have a ton of money to buy all the little things that I need to go along with these wonderful ideas... Even though I haven't been graced with an unlimited Crafts Direct shopping spree, I have decided that I will start (AND FINISH) a project every two weeks. I know that doesn't sound like 'that' many, but I figure that I have other commitments (like my children) that require more attention.

I haven't kept up with blogging as much as I have wanted, so hopefully this will not dwindle off too!

I will keep you all posted and I think I will spend the rest of the weekend deciding on my first 'new' project...

The Ups and Downs of Mommyhood...

Exhausted. Proud. Sad. Excited. What do those four words have in common?  They are all describing how I feel this very moment.

Exhausted... I am a mother of two little ones.. Need I say more? Haha.. I will anyways.  Ok, where do I begin.  Well, Preston isn't the robot baby that Parker was and has been having some sleep issues (I will cover that more in a minute).  I have been so insanely busy this week that I don't know what to do with myself.  Between five playdates so far, a dinner date, two appointments with the boys, remembering snack for school tomorrow (I am reminding myself there, by the way), planning a reunion, having a baby baptized, having a baby turn two (which is very mentally exhausting, if you ask me), and planning a party to celebrate the baptism and birthday... I think I found time to shower once this week.  I honestly don't remember if that is a joke or if I am serious.  Either way.. If I did not feel a strong emotional urge to write this, I woud most definately be sleeping right now.  So.. You better enjoy it!

Proud... I know this may sound a little insane, but I am going to toot my own horn right now (get ready)... Ok, so like I said before, Preston has been having sleep issues.  Here is what our nights have turned into... Put him down around 7:30.  He goes down without a problem.  He gets put in his crib awake and falls asleep no problem.  Around 10 he wakes up. Around 12 he wakes up. Around 2 he wakes up. Around 4 he wakes up. Around 6 he wakes up. Then, finally at 7:30 he comes into bed with me and the boys and I cuddle before we start our days.  Ok, so about him waking up a million times.  He wakes up crying.  He barely eats.  He does not open his eyes.  Most of the time I massage his lower back and he goes right back to sleep.  And I am not just talking about barely rubbing his back.. I mean really massaging!  Odd, don't you think?  A six month old (eek.. he's already six months) should not be in pain and especially need massages every night.  So, I took it upon myself to solve this problem.  I took him to the chiropractor on Wednesday and Dr. Shawn noticed that his whole left hip is locked into place.  I sat there, listening, while he explained some of the things I may have noticed... And then I shared the things I noticed with him.. When I hold Preston on my left hip, he is just fine.  When I hold him on my right, he completely faces forward so he is completely turned away from his left hip (Dr. Shawn believes this is because Preston wanted to keep that leg as straight as possible and that was the only way to relieve the pressure).  I also noticed that Preston sits up insanely straight (Dr. Shawn said that was pretty much the same thing and if I let this problem go unnoticed, Preston may not have ever formed the natural curve in his back that is supposed to be there).  So, little things that I am happy that I DIDN'T let go unnoticed, turned out to be a major issue and I am just proud of myself for taking the little man in and hopefully we will all be able to solve this problem.  So yes.. I am proud I fulfilled my job as a mother this week and thought outside the box to get him the care that he so obviously needs!

Sad... I am writing this on the eve of Parker's second birthday.  Yes, second!  Where in the heck did my little baby go?  I know I have 'newer model', but still... The things he says and does everyday should not be happening.  Two.  Seriously.  Where did that time go?

Excited... With that feeling of sadness at the thought (ok.. truth) that Parker is growing up, also comes an overwhelming feeling of excitement.  He has grown into such an amazing little human being in these last two years (as fast as they may have gone) and I feel so much joy when I think about so many things when I think of the future.  What type of boy will he continue to grow to be?  What amazing adventures will he/we/our entire family have in the coming years? What interesting things will he learn?  How will I find a way to handle all of this without my heart exploding?  These last couple of years have been a roller coaster for our family, and I just thank God everyday that our highs seem to out number our lows.  I have so much to be thankful for and I am so excited to see what other blessings God decides to give us.. Kelley Baby Numero Tres maybe? Haha.. Only time will tell!

So ladies and gentlemen... That is that. And the part that I find the most sickening out of all of it is.. I love what I am doing.  As crabby, exhausted, and smelly as I may be at times.. I LOVE MY JOB! Ok, I am overly emotional I guess and I should probably stop writing before the tears start coming.  Crap, too late!  Well, I have too much to do and I do not have time to cry right now.  So, I hope this post finds you at the right time and reminds you that it is all over way too soon, so we best take advantage of every moment while we still can.  Night all!

I Should Be Cleaning...

FYI.. The title of this post has nothing to do with the actual post.  It's just the truth!

So, today I was checking out some cute quotes to add to some pictures and to the boys' scrapbooks.  I stumbled on one that was truly meant for me, especially for the next couple of weeks...

'We've begun to raise our daughters more like sons, but few have the courage to raise their sons like daughters.' -Gloria Steinem

Ahhh.. I can't even begin to describe how much I needed to hear that today, but I will try!

Parker's second birthday is less then two weeks away (tear) and for the past five months I have been batting around gift ideas for Ben and I to get him.  He's the typical boy... If it has wheels, makes noise, or has something to do with sports.. He loves it.  But there is also another side to my wonderful little man, and that is the side that I really want to encourage.  Parker also enjoys being creative (painting is huge on his list right now), learning (he has also been more obsessed than normal with books and workbooks) and being caring and compassionate (especially to Preston).  Right now I have this feeling that I want and need to help him be as caring and compassionate that I possibly can before it becomes 'uncool' to be an innocent sweetheart!  So, what are we getting him for his birthday you ask? 

A dollhouse.  Yes, a dollhouse.  Ben is actually planning on making one, but either way.. A dollhouse. 

Why?  There are many different reasons (and depending on how long this takes me, I may get to all of them), but it all started when I would watch him play while he was ECFE.  Everyday he would make his way over to the dollhouse.  Not that he would spend the entire two hours there, but everyday, without fail, he would in some way or another show interest in it.  It is so adorable to watch him play with it... 'Girl, sleep' he would say as he would tuck the little girl in to go to bed.  'Daddy, house' he would add, as he would have the dad walk though the living room.  Not to mention the fact that everyday he would hug the little 'dolls' (yes.. my SON plays with DOLLS) and say goodbye.  It was enough to make my heart melt!

At first I thought it was cute, but the more I watched what he was doing.. The more I realized he SHOULD be doing that.  Why is it not ok for a little boy to play house?  I started thinking about what he was learning/doing while he was playing with the dollhouse and the benefits definately outweighed the 'risks.'  I want my son to be a well rounded boy/man/husband someday and creating his own little family at the age of two will get him on track to do that.  He will get to role play different family dynamics and enter his own little world.  Not only that, but the dolls at school are all different ethnicities/genders/sizes/ages and never once has he noticed a difference or show a preference.  All I have seen, at this point, is that 'the mommy gives the baby a kiss and puts them to sleep or the daddy sits on the couch with his son' no matter what color their skin is.  And isn't that how it should be also?  I am constantly in awe at his innocence and I want to harbor his acceptance of others, individuality, compassion for others, and thoughtfulness as long as I possibly can. If there those of you out there that doing this will damage my child or even worse make him *gay* (eek!), I want you to tell me that so I can laugh in your face.  (Did I mention his favorite color right now is purple? The poor kid is doomed).

Parker and his baby

I'll admit, I questioned getting him a dollhouse, but not becuase I was afraid it would *make* him gay (in my opinion, he is going to be homosexual someday, that decision will not be made because I bought him a dollhouse), but I was afraid that he might be made fun... not now, but later.  I just don't want him to have friends over when he's five and some stupid kid mocks him for having it.  Then again, I am hoping my children will not be friends with boneheads like that.. So, I guess we will cross that bridge when we come to it.  I also am partically worried about the 'heat' I will catch for him having it.  I was surprised at the reaction of one of the gifts he got for his first birthday.. A baby and a stoller. My main reasoning for asking someone to get that for him was because I was due with Preston and I thought it would be great for Parker to have his 'own' baby to take care of.  Guess what?  I was right!  Not to mention the fact that it was one of his favorite presents.

So. long story short.. Parker is getting a dollhouse for his birthday and heck.. we might even paint it purple! Haha..

What It All Comes Down To...

These last couple of weeks have been pretty difficult for me... I am a HUGE 'planner' and I hate not knowing what the next day will bring. So, you can understand my frustration of not being sure of where we're going to live or what we're going to do. However, as everything was falling into place, I decided to step back and evaluate the life that I live. Not the life we might live in five years, but the one we're living now. This very moment.

And there is only one word that can express how I feel about it... Blessed.

I have been blessed with an a.maze.ing family. Words cannot express the graditude that I have for all of the support that Ben and I have received. Even if we dont always see eye to eye on everything... I know I have some truly amazing people backing me with ever decision that I make.

I have been blessed with an absolutely wonderful husband. He takes on so much and still has time and love for the boys and I. And at times when it seems like the world is plotting against us (or when Preston has woke up for the fourth time in one night), we are there together and it is an amazing reminder that I am not alone and that I will never be alone for the rest of my life.

I have been blessed with two beautiful boys. They are my sunshine and truly the reason that I try to be a better person everyday (I'm not saying I always succeed, but I'm only human and I'm giving it my all). The love and compassion that they have for everyone/everything they meet is breathtaking. It has been so much fun to come this far with them and I cannot wait to see where our future takes us because I know it will be somewhere outstanding. The boys have taught me so much about myself and I am forever grateful for that. They have shown me how to be happy. Not that I wasn't happy before I had children but the moment I became a mother my idea of happiness changed. I was recently looking at some 'old' pictures of myself (aka pre-children) and my first thought was 'Damn... I look good', but then I brought my mind back to those memories and no, I didn't look good. I looked good in the sense that I didn't have the stretch marks, bags under my eyes, or greasy ponytail that I am sporting these days, but in those pictures I didn't 'feel' good. Now, I feel good. I may have a few pounds that I'd like to lose and I really want to get some sort of tan on this pale skin, but with all of that (and more) I feel like a million bucks. I can't explain how amazing it feels to love yourself. All I can say is that I hope people know what I am talking about. I will one day have to thank Parker and Preston for that.

I have been blessed with some great friends. I feel so lucky to be surrounded by some amazing women who understand me. Again, we may not always see eye to eye on everything, but our friendships are strong enough to understand that and know that is ok. I am in awe at the strength that some of these women have and they have also taught me so much about myself that I would have probably never otherwise learned if I hadnt felt comfortable enough to do so. I don't know where I would be if I didn't have their support.

I know I did a post like this before, so sorry if some of it sounds familiar, but I feel like I have been given so many wonderful things in my life and sometimes when I stand back and take it all in I don't know why I was chosen to receive some great blessings. I understand that my life isn't perfect, but with these blessings it feels pretty damn close. I just hope I can continue to grow and learn and give thanks for everything in my life, not just the good.

I hope this post leaves also feeling blessed for some things in your life. We all deserve happiness and I am so thankful that I have found mine.

The Itch I Can't Scratch.. For Now!

So I have had this horrible itch that I haven't been able to reach in awhile... The worst part is the fact that I think the itch is spreading. So.. I think I should just give in to the temptation and scratch the itch.

I need to to CREATE something... Anything at this point!

I have been surfing the web and as a result I have found some freakin' amazing projects that I need to learn how to make... Sewing, crocheting, scrapbooking, decorating... You name it, I want to do it!

I'm trying to return to the creative world with baby steps.. I recently worked on Parker and Preston's scrapbooks, but it doesn't feel like enough right now.

I recently thought of a few goals I have that will hopefully help me live a more creative life:
*Learn to crochet. There is a class offered at the local craftstore that I am hoping to sign up for. I know some of the most basic things, but I would be really nice to have someone there to help me if I needed it. They also have a 'crochet/knitting' night once a week, so that might be fun to hit up a couple times a month also!
*Purchase a new sewing machine (and learn how to actually use it). I had one from like the 70's or 80's, but it turned out to be more stressful than creative to try to sew on that thing!
*Learn how to actually 'use' my camera. I am totally wasting that amazing piece of equipment by shooting on auto all the time!
*Find a intereting piece of furniture and repaint it. Boring sounding.. I know, but I read a blog about giving something the aged/cottage feel and I think it would be so fun to create something like that.

I will let you all know how these goals and this urge to create pan out... But for now I am off to bed!